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You were played

MORE FROM OVERCOMING SEXUAL ABUSE:  Just because you were not forced into the sexual abuse doesn’t mean you wanted it to happen. The perpetrator may have played on your trust to coerce you to meet his or her sexual needs. You may have been starving for attention, warmth, and affection. You may have been afraid of your family breaking up if you didn’t go along with it, or if you told anyone. You may have been afraid that if you did tell someone you would not be believed. You were not acting on your own free will.” The Right to Innocence by Beverly Engel

When I was raped by 3 guys in my neighborhood I felt so at fault because they didn’t force me into the house, but they did coerce me by telling me their sister was in the house waiting for me.  It took me years to realize that they conned me a child who was lonely, new to an unfamiliar city, had no friends and just wanted to be liked, trust, have friends and fun.  If that has happened to you don’t beat yourself for wanting to believe in the good others and for wanting what you deserve, love and care.

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